In this new age of obsession with and idolization of fake hair and eyes, lighter skin, body modifications and extreme transformations with makeup it’s easy to get caught up and lose yourself. I can tell you this first hand. No I don’t bleach my skin and haven’t had any surgeries to modify my body, nor do I wish to have any… I’m quite happy with my body. Nothing that the gym and eating better can’t fix. I’ve tried contacts for fun but I’m quite happy with my eyes as well. I’ve had my fair share of fake hair in the form of weaves and braids, hell I’m rocking braids right now but it doesn’t mean that I don’t love my own hair, I just like to switch it up from time to time. However, there was a time when I first got into the whole makeup thing and started getting really good with application that I became a little obsessed. I liked the change in appearance so much that without it I was uncomfortable in my own skin. I wouldn’t leave the house at all, not even to run to the store without putting on some type of makeup. I had to fix my brows, put on some foundation and at least apply lipgloss. Now that I look back on it I find this to be quite silly. I spent most of my adult life wearing minimal makeup before I started blogging, but even when I wore nothing I still felt beautiful as this is my face. The one I grew up with. My natural self. I had this discussion with one of my little cousins recently and she explained how she went through the same thing and she thinks that it’s a good topic to blog about. I agreed. Although it may be hard to admit I believe that there are a lot of women out there who may have went through or may be going through the same thing. As a beauty blogger I know that I post a lot of makeup looks for inspiration and encourage brown skinned beauties to step outside of the box and be more comfortable in brighter lip colors and “unconventional” makeup looks, but I can’t stress enough how important it is to love yourself without the facade of makeup.
Those days for me are long gone and these days if I am not going anywhere I do not put on any makeup. If I’m running to the store, doing laundry or just chilling I’m bare faced. Lipbalm is good enough. If I need to be a bit more polished I throw on tinted moisturizer, bronzer and mascara as well. Usually when I go to work I wear a full face as this is part of my look, an accessory… and that’s what’s important to remember, makeup is just that. An accessory. Never get so caught up in the transformation that you lose yourself or are unhappy with your natural appearance. Embrace your natural beauty.
25 Responses
Agree nothing wrong with having fun, but it comes with acceptance of yourself too.
Yup, self love is very important
I love this blog and I hope that it reaches woman who may be struggling with being comfortable with there natural beauty.
Thank you so much Nek and thanks for commenting xo š
well go head on girlfriend! If i had skin like that I’d be loving me too! great post!
xo
Lisa
http://www.lisaalamode.com
Thank you so much, Lisa. It’s still a work in progress, that was a good day lol xo
Great post!
Thank you, Cynthia!
such a wonderful and aspiring post
Thank you so much!
Girl…you have NO idea how timely your post is for me. I mean, it’s like you read my mind and wrote this post specifically for me, because I am presently where you and your little cousin used to be. I’m 33 and after spending most of my adult life quite happy with minimal makeup (lip gloss and mascara at the most), I really got into it last year after a bad breakout left me with dark marks all over my face that I wanted to cover. I started with concealer, then foundation, then eyeshadow, etc. until now I’m a full-fledged makeupaholic, lol!
The only problem is I have grown to hate how I look without makeup on. I have become that girl who will not go anywhere without it on (except the gym…not trying to get breakouts) and I’m at the point where I feel so ugly and insecure when I’m barefaced. I could never understand women who didn’t want their boyfriends to see them without makeup…now I AM that woman. I’m surprised I haven’t taken to waking up early to put my face on so he doesn’t see me barefaced…though sadly, I don’t feel like I’m too far off.
I’m no stranger to low self-esteem and confidence issues so I do realize that’s what’s fueling this problem. I’m working on fixing it but, sigh, it takes time. How did you move past that point? Any tips?
BTW, even though I’m going through the same thing right now, I agree that it was silly of you to feel that way. You’re gorgeous without makeup!
Thank you so much, Yemi. I am not going to say that it was easy because it wasn’t. It took a little time. I had to tell myself constantly that I went about my daily life just fine before all of the makeup and that I don’t need it. I pushed myself to go out more without wearing any and at first I would keep my head down, not give any eye contact and avoid talking to people because I didn’t have “my face” on. I started to take a better look in the mirror and reappreciate what I saw there, and I had to stop caring about what others may think. In reality no one is really looking at us as much as we think they are, it’s all in our heads. I had to tell myself that as long as I feel beautiful that’s all that matters. I have a man who loves me without all of the makeup and the opinions of other men doesn’t matter… nor the opinion of other women who may feel as I once did and hide behind makeup, not loving themselves. Hopefully one day they will see the light as well and if not, not my problem. As my attitude about myself improved internally I begin to externalize that and when I go out without makeup I hold my head high and I’m confident in my natural self again. I realized that just as many men try to “holla” when I don’t wear makeup as when I do. Not that this is important but it’s an example of how we think others look at us is all in our heads. It’s an ongoing process though and I do have my days where I don’t like the way I look… I may be going through a breakout, eyes puffy from not enough sleep and so on and so forth and I’m feeling like I need “my face” today, but I take it one day at a time. I hope that helps!
This is why I love reading your blog! You are so real and open. Great post!
Thank you so much!
Very well said, and a reminder or a eye opener for women who get caught up in always making sure that the outside beauty is more polished and put together more so than focusing on the inside and making sure that is intact first. I have always loved playing in makeup ever since my mom started letting my wear it when I was a teenager. I most definitely know it is just an accessory and look at it as such. I just know for me I know when and wear and how much I need. Like for an example, I wouldn’t just be wearing my bummy clothes like sweats with a full face of makeup, and on the other hand I wouldn’t be going to an event or gathering all dressed up and looking like I just rolled out of bed. There has to be a balance in everything, beauty routine included. Love this topic. Keep up your wonderful posts.
Thank you and well said!
Beautifully said!!
Yemi,
I have exact same issues with the breakouts and covering it up with make-up. It becomes a duty to always try and cover these spots. Erica, yesssss girl!
You are so right I didn’t start wearing makeup until college and I went through a phase where I felt ugly without it. Now I am barefaced all week to work save for lipgloss and only wear makeup on weekends. This helps me appreciate my natural beauty and not to think of makeup as something I need daily. Great topic!
By the way you are beautiful without makeup!
Thank you so much, Venessia! xo š
Your skin is flawless. What is your skin care routine like? I have dark spots on my face that i would like to fade…..and eventually have them disappear. š
Thank you. I use a combination of raw african black soap, Trader Joe’s Tea Tree Face Wash, witch hazel and Trader Joe’s Face lotion and my dark spots has been fading dramatically. Hope that helps š
Great article.
Thanks!